Reviewing My Childhood Reviews: Lady in the Water (2006)

When I was in early high school/middle school I used to write movie reviews. They were terrible. I was so dumb. In an effort to squeeze a laugh or two out of you, I’ve decided to humiliate myself thoroughly by sharing an old review as well as my review of that review, every Wednesday. ThisContinue reading “Reviewing My Childhood Reviews: Lady in the Water (2006)”


Originally written 2019 / Updated 2020 / Updated 2021 Little History on Little Margetis and James Bond I had only seen the Pierce Brosnan and Daniel Craig entries when I decided to do this article. And besides seeing clips here and there of Thunderball on Spike TV, all of these other Bonds were one gigantic mystery to me. My dad wouldContinue reading “JAMES BOND RANKED (UPDATED for No Time to Die)”


It’s the weekend and Covid numbers are sky fucking high. Here’s some stuff you can watch this weekend to help you forget about our predicament. Memories of Murder (2003) Before Parasite, the go-to Bong Joon Ho masterpiece was Memories of Murder, a fascinating true crime drama about two inept cops chasing South Korea’s first serialContinue reading “WHAT TO WATCH THIS WEEKEND”


This weekend, 11-13 – 11-15, there’s some shit you should definitely watch. BOYZ IN THE HOOD (1991) If you’ve already seen this, it’s time for a re-watch. If you’ve never seen this, get on it quick. John Singleton‘s groundbreaking and sadly still relevant look at life in the hood and the systematic racism that perpetuatesContinue reading “WHAT TO WATCH THIS WEEKEND”


David Lynch is one of the best auteurs we have left. His unique form of ambiguous, dream-like and non-plot centric narratives has created great frustration and controversy among many audiences and a small portion of film critics, namely, Roger Ebert (R.I.P.). Ebert appreciated Lynch‘s technical proficiency and obvious talent, but was taken aback and atContinue reading “DIRECTOR SPOTLIGHT: David Lynch”

Franchise with Me: HALLOWEEN w/ Michael Palladino

Welcome to my first recurring segment on, Franchise With Me, where me and a lucky buddy watch a movie franchise together, then assess its value based on overall quality, cultural significance and how entertaining it is. Joining me for this is Phoenix comedian, free-lance writer, avid 80s horror fan and the man who sleepsContinue reading “Franchise with Me: HALLOWEEN w/ Michael Palladino”


Shut up. You deserve it. I. Werewolves, Vampires and Incestuous Shape Shifters The Howling II: Your Sister is a Werewolf (1985) Also known by its alternate title Howling II: Stirba – Werewolf Bitch is a perplexingly awful follow-up to an already bad werwolf hit, The Howling. It retcons a bunch of a plot elements, takesContinue reading “PUNISH YOURSELF WITH THESE AWFUL HORROR MOVIES”

Halloween Streaming Checklist

Movies on Netflix: The Addams Family As Above So Below The Blackcoat’s Daughter Creep Creep 2 The Evil Dead Gerald’s Game Green Room Poltergeist Session 9 Shutter The Silence of the Lambs Under the Shadow TV Shows on Netflix: Black Mirror Hannibal The Haunting of Hill House (NOT Bly Manor) Stranger Things The Twilight ZoneContinue reading “Halloween Streaming Checklist”

PLEASE WATCH THIS: Showgirls (1995)

Sometimes movies just stick with you in a way you never saw cumming. Legendarily hated upon its release by both critics and mainstream audiences, Paul Verhoeven‘s explicit, outrageous and anything but sexy Showgirls has gained a momentous cult following in years since its 1995 release, especially among the LGBTQIA community. Parody shows are frequently performedContinue reading “PLEASE WATCH THIS: Showgirls (1995)”

The 50 Best 80s Horror Movies *Part 5 (#10-1)*

Finishing off this list of my personal Top 50 80s Horror films with my Top 10… 10. A Nightmare on Elm Street (1984) Freddy Krueger * Sleep Disorders * Dead Teenagers * Dark Humor * Legit Scary * Low Budget A movie no one thought would succeed, made on a shoe-string budget (which it madeContinue reading “The 50 Best 80s Horror Movies *Part 5 (#10-1)*”